“I’m still numb,” the Facebook post reads. “Sitting in the hospital, I can’t imagine this happened to me.”
Followed by a comment of “OH MY GOD WHAT HAPPENED?!?! ARE U YOU ALL RIGHT?!?”
Followed by me wanting to punch someone in the face.
It’s a small mercy, I admit, but if I see someone posting incomplete snippets about some major tragedy in their lives, I click on their name and see what else they’ve posted recently. Because, you know, if someone’s undergoing a mind-shattering trauma, the last thing they probably want to do is bring lazy sons-of-bitches up to date on something they posted about half an hour ago.
Yet I always see that flood of slothful, inconsiderate ignorance, and the only reason I don’t start a flame war with these morons is because, well, “moderating a flame war between two friends in the middle of a mind-shattering trauma” is probably actually the last thing they want to do. But still. These people are oafs, selfishly shouldering their way to the front of the line and saying, “Yeah, I could click something to find out what’s going on, but instead why don’t I suck up more of your time and energy with demands for news you’ve already given?”
How self-centered do you have to be, really? Not to see what else they’ve been up to, and find the news so easily discovered? Do you think you’re actually being a friend by offering not support, but a redundant demand?
What dicks. I hate them with a tabasco-fiery passion. Unless I click through to that poor suffering bastard’s Timeline to discover that no, they’ve given no other updates and are just being annoyingly cryptic about the nature of this hospital stay, in which case I’ll ask, “OH MY GOD WHAT HAPPENED?!?! ARE U YOU ALL RIGHT?!?”
Cross-posted from Ferrett's Real Blog.